I can be a freak about things, and my skin is weird.

This morning I really screwed up. I have a usual morning routine, and today I screwed it all up. By 9:49am I had looked at all my usual websites, blogs, etc. and spoke with “I like cheese’. Usually the websites are spread out throughout the day, but today I breezed through them all super fast for some reason, and called “I like cheese” which I usually do around 11:00am. I’m feeling a little bleh, and at the same time all antsy.

On the bright side I think my hair looks extra good today, hope fully it will look just as good later when filming some parts for the new Elektra Elf episode. Last time I had scenes was about five or six weeks ago, and had an allergic reaction to “Spirit Gum” which is a glue that is supposed to be safe for the skin, and is used in theatre. Not only did I have an allergic reaction, but also the open rash that reacted from the Spirit Gum got infected, so I walked around with a red staph infection all over my neck, ears, and scalp line. My ears were oozing from the back, and at one point my right ear was so swollen that it popped out to a 90-degree angle and I was looking like SLOTH from the Goonies. That ear dangling felt weird and weirder. Nevertheless I am looking forward to the shoot today.

Jury Duty

Yesterday I enjoyed doing my part of our justice system by trying to get out of actually being part of the jury that would decide a man’s fate. I had been summoned to a civil court, and arrived slightly early. Just enough time to get a seat that I would own instead of sitting in between people and feel weird about it. The blonde woman who was running the show, yes it was a show, was speaking what I can only assume is her normal speech to jurors. She spoke with a repetitive up and down motioning of her head, if left to watch her any longer than I did I probably would have become quite nauseous. In between her deadening speeches she would make a phone call and laugh far too loudly and long. The only other person that I know who made such a laugh was an original staff writer of SNL, and her laugh was always assumed caused from lots of cocaine usage. Thankfully this blonde courthouse clerk did not share the same style of women’s breast support that the writer had, I wouldn’t have wanted to see her boobies dangling without support, nope not her.

The civil court only had one case that needed 12 or so jurors, but criminal court needed 30 jurors. The manic blonde clerk asked for volunteers, with the ploy of the courthouse being brand new, every, even the bathrooms. What an offer! Surprisingly three people got up, one of them was the creepy eating disorderly thin woman who sat next to me, and worked as a publicist. She had worn a backless, sleeveless dress; I swear if her spine and arms had eyes they were staring at me. For this, I was glad that she was leaving my sights. That left 27 other juror spots for criminal court. I ended up being plucked up to go for the walk over to the criminal courts. Not being soundly familiar with the courthouse area, I wasn’t fully sure where I was exactly walking, but thankfully I had that spine that stood out on the street that I followed to the new 25 story State courthouse. Immediately after passing through the security checkpoint and having to remove my belt to do so, I went for the nearest bathroom. Yes, it was new, but I don’t see how it lived up to the touting that the blonde clerk made it to be. In fact, whoever ordered the sinks would have been sent to the eastern most section of Siberia had it been built in Soviet Era Moscow. They have giant sink basins, with the smallest of sink heads that barely enter the sink basin, so you have to touch the dirty sink in order the rinse with water. Purel came in handy. The waiting room for jurors was huge, it had capacity to fit about 680 people according to fire safety signs, and it had a dozen or so 50-inch plasma screen TVs. This would have been great if they had something good on, instead of MSNBC coverage of death and carnage in India.

So, my name was called in for a jury selection. I went up to the 19th floor, to a crystal clean floor, and sat in a pew that had the same look of my mothers kitchen table. The judge was a pleasant fellow overall, and was much better in attempting to make it not feel like surgery compared to the judge I had 5 years ago. When asked if there was an emergency that would not allow my presence at a trial for a week I got up, explained my case, and was shot down and told, “that’s not excusable”. The prosecutor was way too full of smiles; every time she stood up she had on a full toothed grin with dimples. The defense attorney was a boorish man who lacked even half a smile, and further lacked good posture. The defendant was a foreign man who did not speak English, and had a court appointed interpreter on his left hand side. I assume that the defense counsel was court appointed too. I felt bad for the man on trial based on what CXB said of his court appointed attorney, which was that the attorney didn’t return his calls, or go over what he (CXB) should be done in court prior to actually being in there. The clerk next to the judge called 16 names to go sit in the jury box, thankfully I wasn’t called. I was still forced to watch the proceedings.

The proceedings when something like this, with the alleged crime itself being a mystery. In the beginning the judge said that a woman alleged that the man touched her inappropriately at knifepoint inside Prospect Park. The judge asked everyone personal questions that might pertain to giving an unfair judgment prior to the facts of the case. Both the prosecutor and defense attorneys asked similar questions over and over and over in different ways. The prosecutor referred to the alleged crime as a sexual assault, which the defense attorney objected to, the judge had informed the jury that it wasn’t sexual assault. No one officially said what the man was really charged with, and people in the jury box even said, no one has said what crimes this man is charged with specifically. From what I gathered and assumed from the lines of questions was that the man and woman went on a few dates, they were out on a date in Prospect Park, at some point a knife was allegedly pulled out, either before or after he allegedly touched her breast, and that there were no witnesses to this occurring. Based on my basic assumption the case doesn’t seem to have good legs to stand on, but I don’t know for sure, since I didn’t actually see the evidence and no one was even informed what the man is charged with.

If he did do that entire event, I’m not sure why? If he did pull a knife and touched a breast, he obviously wasn’t waiting in respect of the woman and waiting for her to feel comfortable enough to allow him the touch her. I mean they were out on a bunch of dates together already. Why didn’t hadn’t he leaned in and tried to kiss her yet, why hadn’t she leaned in for a kiss, and why hadn’t they made out to the point that they felt each other up yet? I’m not saying that he didn’t do it, I’m just finding it odd that they apparently didn’t already get to second base after a few dates, that’s all.

So, of the original 16, five people were actually placed on the jury, and then 16 more people had to get called up to the jury box. I was one of the unfortunate ones to be called. Just as I sat down the prosecutor asked to approach the bench. The prosecutor, defense attorney, and judge were talking about me. The prosecutor wanted to have me excused from the case so I could go to college next week. The judge played dumb, and had no memory of speaking with me for five minutes only three hours earlier. I was called to the bench, and the judge asked if I had college next week, and I answered yes, he said, “you’re excused from the case, not from jury duty”. I went back down to the jury pool room, and was then released from jury duty all together. I don’t have to go back for six years!

I actually wouldn’t mind sitting on a jury. I think it would be fun, and I would most likely come away from it feeling good, in that I either convicted a guilty man, or set a man free for being actually innocent, or there not being evidence that they did a crime. I just didn’t want to sit on this one, due to my starting college next week. I figured I had waited eight years to continue with conventional education, if I got delayed again, it might have continued the delay another eight years.

GAWKER.COM

Yesterday I set in to the gawker tip line, and they printed my Larry King and his gass issues as being the possible actual reason for the gas explosion on the UES yesterday. I’m so happy!

http://gawker.com/news/top/larry-king-seen-suspiciously-close-to-gas-explosion-186141.php

I Quit My Temp Job

I gave until Friday as my notice, and go out on jury duty tomorrow. My agency asked for an email describing what I my day-to-day functionality is, this way they don’t put another me in the place. Another me, meaning someone who would actually prefer to accomplish something from their time, and not waste it sitting around surfing the internet for 8 hours, 7 hours is fine to surf, but 8 is too much. So, below is the exact email that I wrote to my temp agency.

Alyce,

I would have to classify my day to day functionality to that of a goforboy, I close the door (as requested) to Vivian’s office when she is on the phone or having a meeting and forgets to close the door, I go and get her materials from the printer, and I scour the floor to look for someone when she needs them.

Over the course of the assignment I have utilized MS Excel for various spreadsheets, and cross checking items. I also used MS Word to create a manual for basic Administration items. I drove a couple of PowerPoint presentations. I called the helpdesk for PC issues on behalf of various people, ordered keys to the drawers and offices, put together binders, set up the laptop and projector for presentations, and walked over to the front doors to let people in to the 7th floor.
I have never set up her schedule, answered her phones with exception to the front security desk, or done anything that I would classify as a project.

Regards,

Happier Thoughts

I was correct in that there was some type of big fire off of Madison, but it was a townhouse that blew up from a gas leak, not the tall building next door. The reports aren’t saying that anyone was killed or seriously injured, which is good. I also walked by the block on my way up to my college, I got to see all of the flashing lights, and people standing around on Park Ave & looking across at a big fire truck that blocked the view of the sidewalk – but when I crossed the street it looked like the building was flat. Four or five stories flattened to about the thickness of a car, if that. Trust me that is a happier thought, since the world doesn’t seem to be coming to an end from a gas leak.

This Weekend

Yesterday I saw the new Strangers with Candy movie at the Sunshine theater. The movie was good, and afterwards I needed to pee. If you have never been into the men’s room at the Sunshine, let me describe it. You open the door, and there are either two men standing with their junk out relieving themselves, or you see two clean yet disgusting urinals, then two sides along the back wall, with a dark handicap accessible stall. There was a guy standing at the 2nd urinal, and I went to go to the dark stall, as I passed the man, I accidentally bumped into him. I’m no pro at bathroom protocol, but I figured an apology without eye contact is probably the rule of thumb.

Me: Sorry
Dude at Urinal: It’s okay. It wasn’t out yet.

Wasn’t out yet? Way too much info for me to hear. Then I finished, washed up, and waiting for the ever so beautiful “I Like Cheese” to come out of the women’s room. I sat on a tall comfy stool, and ignored the man who I just bumped into at the stall who is awaiting his lady friend. A guy in his early 20s came running up the stairs with the look of dire need of a bathroom. He hurried over to the women’s room, went to open the door, then read the sign “WOMEN” and got all pissy about it – no pun intended. He looked around in a hurry, and could not see the men’s room sign on the other side of the wall, looked to go up another flight of steps, and saw that it was probably the roof up there, and turned around sadly and walked down the stairs. I can only hope and assume that this man wet his pants, then sat and watched some indie movie and thought he was so smart and amazing for watching it. Something like “An Inconvenient Truth”, which I will never see do to Al Gore being an idiot; which has nothing to do with the issue or debate of Global Warming.

I also went to a BBQ birthday this Saturday night. Blueberry Stoli came out last week, and that stuff is delicious. It smells great, tastes great, and will make loads taste like Blueberry, so I hear. The BBQ was in a gorgeous newly restored garden, and there were two black cats in the neighboring yard named Girby (Garden Herbie) & Kirby (Kitten Herbie), and the birthday gift was a big swing that fits three people, or two morbidly obese people. I want a big swing like that one for my backyard garden. Yes, yes I do.

The happiest news possible right now, I called my agency and informed them that Friday will be my last day on this assignment. I had informed them a few weeks about my disappointment of everything that was described of this temp job not actually taking place, and that I was day to day a goforboy. With my good standing at the agency, and my manager having a previous poor standing with the agency, it doesn’t look like any harm will be done to me. My contact at the agency said “I’ll call evil manager name and let her know that Friday is your last day, she doesn’t return calls, so on Monday she might be shocked when there isn’t anyone working for her”. For me that is perfect, I don’t need to say anything to the evil one, since that might create a bad situation, and the evil one most likely won’t return the phone call since she never returned the ones where they tried to reach out to her in order to help me out. No lost sleep for me. To top it off, due to the jury duty tomorrow, I have to get this weeks timesheet signed today, and that will most likely mean I will be Weekend BIJ tonight through whenever. Jury Duty does not scare me, and I’m actually looking forward to watching people sitting in a jury box and being annoyed that they had bad luck and were picked to sit on a jury. Ah, happier times await.