The Oscars…
Posted by beehive on 26 Feb 2007 at 07:48 am | Tagged as: Uncategorized
Have traditionally been lame and plain old awful to watch, and this year was no different – it is this reason that I don’t have a clue as to why people are having nonsense small talk about how bad of a show it was this year – it basically sucks every year.
My highlights of the entire thing are:
1. Eddie Murphy told Barbara Walters one whopper of a lie when he said that right now is the best time of his life and that there were no ripples in the water whatsoever. Hmm… apparently having to go through a paternity test soon with a former lover :cough scary spice cough: to see if you are indeed the true father of her baby to be, and darting accusations of having sexual affairs with the transgendered folk is truly just another day in the sun, not a cloud in the sky, not a ripple on the water. I honestly don’t know how Walters doesn’t flat out laugh until she cries when she gets answers like yours during an interview.
2. Sandra Oh, indeed looked ugly to my eyes – still, while both Helen Mirren and Streep looked so F-able for some odd reason.
3. Jessica Biel looked awful. I wonder if she got her hairstylist out of a crackerjack box for the event last night, and her gown looked like a cheap cut up rug.
4. Ellen stayed fairly true to her good comic wit. She did a great hosting job, while having no hoity toity Billy Crystally type of annoying nose up in the air attitude about hosting the Oscars.
5. The Departed and Scorsese both did not get screwed – FINALLY!
Eddie Murphy boned Scary Spice? Not bad. Eddie Murphy needs a scandal really bad. If I were him, I’d stage one. He is so out of the newspapers he may never find his way back. Seriously BIJ can you hear the name & not start thinking of 80s porno movie synthesizer soundtracks? He’s just doing the No-Tron Dance.
Helen Mirren’s tits looked like they sagged less than mine. un-fucking-believable.
It’s called duct tape and a
push up bra. The woman is 61. You just KNOW her tits are down to her knees…
And how about those bland, downright annoying songs that they give Oscars to.
CC- he most certainly did, but claims that Scary Spice was boning lots of men at the time of her conception.
DMB- Thank for giving me the visual of your rack, albeit saggy boobs.
Cheese- I refuse to believe your duct tpae and push up bra theory.
Stefa- Those songs/skits were painful (with exception to Ellen making the funny) to sit through. Thankfully I fell asleep during the show.
Somehow I forgot to mention yesterday the audience pan shot of Scorsese while Tom Cruise came out. Behind Scrosese was Penelope Cruz, who was not looking at the stage like everyone else. Instead she had her head turned left with a look of disgust on her face while Cruise spoke. Great television moment.