We decided to go on a daylong kayak trip down the Delaware River. It was through a group thing, that just about anyone could go with, as long as they paid the required money. So the Cheese, Cheese’s sister, the Brit, and myself went, along with two full vans worth of people that we didn’t know, so I’m guessing that there were around 30 to 35 people in total there, one of which was a guy that had three thumbs that we could stop looking at –THREE THUMBS!

It was a warm sunny day in the summer, once we got through the river I realized that it was not as scary as I thought it would be, and that I would definitely do it again.

Our group of four were the first to finish the river because it turns out that the Cheese’s sister hates kayaking, and only found this out once she got on the river, and the three that enjoyed kayaking didn’t enjoy being around the rest of the group that we quietly referred to as “weirdos” so we paddled faster down the river than everyone else.

As we waited on the shore for our driver to arrive so that we could change and get back to the city, everyone straggled in – some in better shape than others. One particular out of it person was a gal in her 20s, she had big boobs, yet was wearing a bikini instead of a full swimsuit.

I’m all for wearing whatever you want, but when you’re going down a river with some rapids you need to be covered, otherwise you will pop out. So as she came out of the river, I could hear the three girls were gasping at her, but didn’t see what the problem was until I turned around and saw that the river moved those big boobs around inside the bikini top, and they appeared as though instead of only being two boobs, there were now four boobs, and we now sticking out a few inches below her bikini top. It looked crazy, and I immediately gasped an “Oh, dear lord” as she walked by me, and we all laughed, which was an innocent statement, but it was just too funny.

After everyone landed safely on shore the guy running the group broke out the coolers full of soda, chips, and beer.

As I fiddled around with my bag in a trunk, the Cheese came over and asked if I would like a beer, to which I replied with a big yes. The Cheese walked away from my back left side towards my right to go get us beers.

When I was finished in the trunk with my bag, I turned around to my right side to go meet up with the Cheese where I thought she’d be. I saw her through my “party on the inside sunglasses” with her blonde hair, beer in hand, talking with a group of people that I didn’t recognize, so walked over and hugged her from behind.

As I began to hug her she drank from her beer, and I for some reason felt the need to pet her butt, as I asked if she got me one.

The Cheese turned her head slightly and asked “What?”

“Did you get me a beer?” I asked.

“No” She said, as I continued to pet and squeeze her butt gently.

The Cheese seemed different at my doing this for some reason, she sort of felt different too, and turned around saying things that didn’t sound familiar to me, which left me in a confused way.

I looked at the Cheese’s face under the long blonde hair and sunglasses and realized that the woman that I had just been caressing was not my girlfriend, Cheese.

“Oh my God, I am so sorry, so so sorry. I thought you were my girlfriend.” I pleaded confused, hoping that the woman didn’t hit me, or call the police due to a completely innocent mix up.

I frantically looked around and saw the Cheese standing over with two familiar faces, smiling at me.

“I thought you were her.” Pointing at the Cheese, apologized quickly again, and then bolted over to the Cheese with complete embarrassment.

The real Cheese asked what was up, and I informed her how I just fondled a woman that I thought was her, to which everyone laughed at me for being a fool.

In all fairness to me, they both had on similar black swimsuits, long blonde hair, similar builds, sunglasses on, and the other woman was in the area that I last saw the Cheese walking to – how was I to know that there was a Cheese look-alike in the group, she wasn’t in the vehicle we rode up in.