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Check out this infant of a bee I found sitting on top of a blooming daisy in my backyard.

It had just rained in torrential down pours the night before, and this little guy was cleaning himself off while bathing in a sea of pollen.

Also, how cool is that daisy bloom!?!?!?!?!

I highly recommend that if you have the free time tonight you should see this, or if you need to blow off a wake, you should still see this by blowing the wake off without hesitation!

In either case, I highly recommend that you see my good friend Rob Shapiro be MAN!  Tonight!!!

There is no pulling of your legs when I say that he is a genius comic with hysterical riffs and rants, insanely funny characters, and pathetically hilarious stories.

He owns the stage and is well deserved of his self proclaimed title “King of Total Stream of Consciousness”!!!

The poster says $10, but his MySpace bulletin says free, so I’m really not sure if it’s free or a $10 cover - so if need be call ahead to Mo Pitkin’s to inquire exact price - if any.  However, 10 bucks sounds like a deal considering that you’re likely to get enough belly laughs to make you forget everything else going on in your life.

Mo’s is located at 34 Ave A between 2nd and 3rd Streets. 

Last night I slept with the covers on.  It was hot as balls everywhere.  I didn’t have my air conditioner in the window, and yet still had those covers on.

In the middle of the night I could feel the Cheese struggling to get some covers on her at 5AM, as it gets cold in my neighborhood at night due to its proximity to the waterfront - I had been hogging them covers.

Then this morning when I woke up, Cheese asked how I could sleep in this heat with the covers on. 

My answer was simply this, “the covers protect me from the ghosts and boogie men that haunt my place each night…and it also protects me from being murdered by the ghost of Chris Benoit.”

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While I did say those exact things to her this morning.  I can’t help but ask…too soon?

It’s hard to believe that this little baby is now a one year old as of today, and is now deserving of its own Cookie Puss.

Yes, let’s take a look back in time, and reflect on the first year.

Remember when I first started this blog as a way to keep me from losing my mind from working at such an awful job?  And then the post that I wrote about my then boss that last day of working there?  Man, am I glad that those days are long gone, and also that I’ve learned not to do many things with postings.

Or how about those subway stories, huh? Remember when a gal sneezed on my face, or the time that I had really bad gas, then posted a Missed Connection on Craigslist that eventually got picked up by Gawker, or the time that a bum plucked a crab from his crotch?  Dang it, I’d love to live those all over again.

And who can ever forget the goings on of my nose…here, here, or here.  I really need to start keeping my fingers out of there.

Anyways, I’d just like to the fours of you who read this blog.  Now go out and eat some clementines for me. 

I took Cheese to the Mets game this past Saturday evening, and as a cheap side thrill, we caught a fight in the stands.

From when I started seeing the action, there was a big tall heavyset guy that was in the walkway looking down at the group of young white wannabe thugs that had been attempting to cause trouble on the walkway while I stood in line for ice cream earlier in the night, and there was a group of people beginning to stand up around them all to watch. 

The big guy appeared to be the back up of the “real fighter”, who was a muscle head guido wearing a wife beater, who also just happened to be overly tanned.

The guido was standing on the steps talking up about wanting to fight the faux thugs, and yet wasn’t doing anything but talk.  All the while the faux thugs were white as ghosts at the thought of getting into a fight…

Only after security finally arrived did the guido finally make faux attempts to take swings and actually fight.  Personally I thought it was great that security finally arrived, cause I was hoping that they would take the guido away - to stop him from looking like the wussy fool he actually was. 

As security took him off up the steps, the big tall guy went down to set the faux thugs straight with only his words.  While this was happening the wussy guido ran up from behind the bunch and sucker punched the one faux thug closest to him in the left eye. 

Everyone saw it happen as it came out of left field, and the faux thug who got hit, stood there, took it, and then waited for the wussy guido to turn and walk away.  Only then did the faux thug sucker punch the wussy guido in the back of the head. 

It was the lamest and dumbest thing that could have happened out of the situation.  Both side could have easily have just walked away without fighting, and without getting arrested…

No one else threw a punch.  Security came over more, and took both guys out.  Most likely to the little jail cell inside Shea Stadium, and were most likely arraigned on Monday morning - whether they wanted to press charges on each other or not.

Those two fools ended up missing to only actual exciting baseball action that occurred in the bottom of the 9th inning, and more importantly, those two fools most likely ended up having to either sit right across from each other in the tiny cells, or worse, sit in the same cell together - while they could only hear the crowded stands cheering as the Mets won. 

I imagine that they both just sat there mumbling underneath their breath about how it was the other guys fault.

In any case, those morons ended up missing a great ending to a great pitchers game.  Here’s to you, morons!