Lately I’ve been doing alot of thinking about what drinking beer or hard liquor does to me.

And I’ve come to the realization that beer and booze are what makes me feel as though I am missing out on something if I’m not out somewhere.

When I’m out having a drink I find that I never want to go home.  I never want the bar to close, I never want the people drinking to go home, and I never want to miss anything.   

When I’m out somewhere with a cocktail in hand I’m usually quite bored with the surroundings and find that there really isn’t much of anything to miss.  Yet somehow with each of the slightest dribbles of alcohol to my tongue the alcohol makes me feel as if I don’t stay out until sunrise I will miss it all.

What exactly I might miss… I have no idea…

Thankfully I usually have a reason to leave the drinks behind, but when I don’t… ohhhhh man…

Saturday evening as I went to exit the Manhattan bound side of the R train at Union Street I happened to look down and spotted a black tennis sneaker laid out perfectly – with exception to it being in the middle of the subway turnstile, and missing its mirrored opposite.

I’m sure that you’re saying to yourself right now that this pictured sneaker is turned on its side, and there’s a very good reason for this – I tripped over it.

I’m a klutz, what can I say.  I’ve been one ever since being an adolescent, and haven’t been able to break from the klutz chains since.

Anyways, I spotted the sneaker, laying there perfectly under the turnstile, as if the owner of the sneaker was in such a rush that as they ran for the R train, they literally ran out of their sneaker – and didn’t realize it until the subway doors closed.  So I giggled to myself about the poor sap who lost his sneaker while rushing to catch the subway, and in doing so I stumbled myself through the turnstile and tripped over the sneaker in the perfect Chevy Chase fashion.

So there you all have it – I’m a dork.

Yet this doesn’t explain who the dork was that lost his sneaker…

So some of you may already know this, and or even worse (if you are over age 12) anticipated the release of the new Harry Potter book.

I just wanted to extend my thoughts about this book to those adults out there who have just wasted another day in their lives by reading this…

YOU HAVE ALL JUST WASTED ANOTHER DAY OF YOUR LIVES!!!  THIS BEING THE 7th BOOK MEANS THAT YOU WASTED A WEEK OF YOUR LIVES BY READING ALL SEVEN BOOKS!

I hope that you’re all happy with your choice reading at a level suited for 9 - 12 year olds.  Seriously keep enjoying yourselves, and if the Smurfs ever come back to Saturday morning television be sure to let me know.

So I have this favorite little burger place that’s in Park Slope, it’s called Brooklyn Burger Bar.  For an actual review of this place, click here.

It’s by far my favorite burger joint in Brooklyn because I don’t really frequent any other, they have good buffalo burgers, and you can get sweet potato fries at no extra charge with your burger deluxe.

Mmm Mmm Good.

I’m not here to give an actual review of the entire place – other than it is really tasty, affordable, and the bar hasn’t yet been overly loud at any time that I’ve eaten there - so I give it a five stars. 

Did I mention that at least one of the waitresses has a big hairy mole on her arm, and the first time I saw it I thought she had a long haired hamster climbing up her body???  Well she does, and I did think it.

Anyways, I found myself eating there this weekend with the Cheese. 

We both knew what burgers we would order, but needed to ask about the beer situation.

When the very short and very young looking blond waitress timidly came up and asked us if we wanted to start with any drinks the Cheese asked what beers they had.

Waitress:  Oh…umm… we have lots of different bottled beers, but no tap.

Cheese:  So what beers do you actually have? 

Waitress:  There’s really alot.  We have a huge selection.  If you name one, I’m sure we’ll have it.

Cheese:  Okay, can I get a hoegaarden?

Waitress:  Sure.

Beehive:  I’ll have one too.

Waitress:  Okay, I’ll be right back.

(two minutes pass)

Waitress returned empty handed.

Waitress:  We’re out of hoegaarden.

Cheese:  Okay, can I get something similar to a hoegaarden?

Waitress:  Ummm… do you know a name of any beers similiar to it, cause we really have alot of different beers.

Beehive:  Is heffevison similar?

Cheese:  Yes, I’ll have a heffevison.

Waitress:  Oh, we’re out of that too.

Cheese:  Well what beers do you have in stock?

Waitress:  Alot, but we’re out of those two.

Cheese:  We need time to think.

Waitress walks away, and the Cheese goes to the bar to explore their “wide variety”

Cheese returns…

Cheese:  They have seven beers and they’re all domestic!

In an amazing turn of events the waitress still somehow earned a 20 plus % tip.

Remember that steam pipe explosion that happened this past Wednesday evening?  The one that sent lots of tiny particles of asbestos into the air?  No?  Well CC John was there and could tell you all about it, just click here.

So there’s some more news about this story besides the good news of CC John’s survival - the city is re-opening up the blast area to the public.

Thankfully some 18 air tests have shown that the air level for asbestos is at zero, however, ground samples are indeed coming back positive for asbestos.  Last night after the 18 air tests came backnegative the city sprayed down all of the buildings in the area in an attempt to remove the asbestos that was on them – hmmm…doesn’t spraying the facade of a building that is contaminated with asbestos with a high pressure hose send whatever is on the facade (asbestos) into the air???  Anyone… Anyone… Mr. Wizard?

Mr. Wizard:  Yes, yes it does.

No word has come back on the air level safety since the spraying, but somehow by opening the area back up to the public the city declares ”It’s now safe”- I would think the complete opposite.

So as we all pass through the Grand Central / Chrysler building area let us all breath freely (assuming that the asbestos that once again flew through the air landed safely (har har) on the street level), and float our way through the air – cause that’s just about the only safe way to get through the area right now.

Remember, you don’t want to track tiny particles of asbestos wherever you walk – cause it will eventually end up in your lungs – so keep floating.