I’ve seen jerks comment onother peoples blogs in the doucheiest of douchebag fashions. 

I myself have always felt good about my not having to deal with such jerks – that is until yesterday, when commenter “nicole” decided that she needed to spew her hate towards me over a post written over two weeks ago.

The post in question in which she spews hate towards me is the post in which I railed against Verizon Wireless, and their Verizon 411 connect charges. 

Now to the my naked eye “nicole” appears to be a Verizon Wireless employee…

And after being told by “nicole” to “suck a dick” I thought I’d just say thank you to her. 

If you’d like to tell “nicole” thank you personally, she can be reached at lil_loka_phx@yahoo.com 

Nicole, have a great weekend!

I know I will.

As you all know from my post last week, the one in which I spoke about having to choose between my lifelong dream of being a contestant on the American Gladiators and going to a New York Mets baseball game that happened to be bucket hat day – I ended up picking the Mets game. 

I remember or at least thought that I remembered having gone to a New York Mets bucket hat day game when I was around seven or eight years old.  I remember getting the bucket hat and feeling so happy and proud of it.  I felt that having the bucket hat made me feel as though I was on the team, that Keith Hernandez could look at me, and see a little bit of me in him.

See this hat that John Olerud is sporting?

That is what I remember my bucket hat being.  Now in hindsight, I realize that John Olerud is sporting a helmet hat, and NOT a bucket hat.

This is the hat that I got from the New York Met game on Saturday…

It’s a “bucket” hat, and it should be called a fisherman hat.

Don’t get me wrong, the hat is a fairly neato hat, but when you expect a hard helmet as the free giveaway at the Mets game and instead end up with this wimpy fabric hat, you end up very disappointed – at least I did.

I ended up giving being strong armed into giving the bucket hat to my five year old nephew who did not attend the game.

When he got his my bucket hat he realized that it was too big for him.  Can you believe my five year old nephew traded the bucket hat back to me for only the ticket stub?!?!  Quite foolish on his part….

Here’s my old friend Tony Bennett modeling the bucket hat.  He says that it looks better on him, but I beg to differ.

What do you think?

Oh, and I know what you’re thinking…that my old friend Tony Bennett looks familiar, and you’re right, he does look familiar.  You might recognize him from your local Krispy Kreme Donuts… 

And he works there on weekends…

That was the joke between my friends was when I was 11 years old.  See, all quarter drinks were a quarter, all except for the ones in this one particular bagel store in the neighborhood – they charged 30 cents for their quarter drink.

So there we be, holding up these quarter drinks…

 

“Hey, how much is this quarter drink?”

“30 Cents!”

So a couple of weeks ago when I NEEDED to find me a quarter drinkI searched all over, then I remembered this bagel store, and figured that even thoughI haven’t been there in ten years, it was my last straw of luck, and I would try it.

Low and behold the 30 cent bagel store had orange and red quarter drinks in stock.  I picked one up excitedly, and immediately asked how much the quarter drink was, figuring inflation probably pushed the price of quarter drinks up to 50 cents…

“Excuse me, how much is this quarter drink?”  I asked.

“Quarter drink.”  The guy replied looking at my hand.

“Yeah, it’s a quarter drink.  How much?”  I repeated.

“It’s a quarter drink.  A quarter!”  He snapped back.

Apparently that guy forgets the days when his bagel shop sold quarter drinks at a premium…oh well.

I headed out of work about ten minutes early yesterday with a massive head cold, and on the way home I just wanted to nap the entire ride away, wake up and feel 100% better. 

Instead I opened my eyes while the train had its doors open at Rockefeller Center and spotted a little Hasidim lady dwarf pitter patter her way past me – my day instantly became better.

Her mere sight put a smile on my face, and I couldn’t close my eyes right away.  I needed to take her in, and process what I was seeing, it was almost as if she was an illusion – to be honest I had never seen a Hasidim dwarf before.

This little Hasidim lady dwarf was the perfect combination between an average sized Hasidim lady, and a dwarf.  She had the normal blue skirt and old fashioned button down top, with her hair in the quintessential hairdo that all Hasidim women have (is it a wig?), as well as the height of 4’2″, and tiniest of hands with her little fingers all pointing everywhere – both classic signs of dwarfism.

As this hasidic lady dwarf sat there with her feet dangling back and forth, she took out her needlepoint set and began to needlepoint! 

I was in heaven!

I couldn’t help but keep a nearly constant stare on her tiny hands pushing in and out of her unicorn setting as she needlepointed the green grass that the unicorns were standing on.

If it were any closer to Christmas, I very well might have believed the Hasidim lady dwarf to be the Miracle of Christmas.

P.S. It was impossible to get a camera photo of her from where I was sitting.  I’ll try to leave a little early again to get a photo.

Have headcold…

 

will nap for food..