So I’ve been clean and sober for 10 full days!!!  How exciting!

By clean and sober I mean completely and utterly abiding to my vow of celibacy. 

These 10 days are probably the longest amount of time that I’ve held it all in me in a number of years, and as you can imagine, I’m learning a lot about me and this whole celibacy thing.

For starters, it’s much easier than I thought it would be to not give into temptations - hopefully this weekend won’t get the best of me. 

Secondly, being celibate cold turkey falls along the lines of quitting coffee or cigarettes - the sudden change can cause frustration and a short fuse. 

On Wednesday I had a very short fuse, and was cussing like a sailor at work.  Then yesterday I was on the road to cussing again, a coworker made a comment of how I “sure do cuss a lot”.  So I refrained from the standard cusses, and changed my cussing up to be not so straight to the point…

  • Skata na fas!
  • (fist bumped together)
  • Up yer buddy with a meat hook!

This change was warmly welcomed and laughed at.

Lastly, my ween is sort of turning into an adult version of an eight year olds ween.  No, it isn’t shrinking - it’s more of…how can I say this delicately…losing my aim control. 

Most young boys have downright awful control when it coming to going number 1.  Even though they are holding the ween, the ween’s line of sight is blind and antsy at best.  It wants to flow left, then right, then down to the left, then far right - you can’t control it, and pee ends up going everywhere within a foot and a half radius of the bowl, leaving much cleanup after each trip to the restroom.

While it was entertaining the first couple of trips to the bathroom, I hope that this is just a phase of muscles just relearning what it is like to pee without steady ya know internal muscles getting routine use. 

These three things sure do make me sound as though I’m being the perfect Catholic boy.