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High School English

I was on my high school alumni Facebook page and saw a message from my sophomore year English teacher.  It said something along the lines of, “Do former teachers count as alumni?”

Last I heard he had moved down to New Orleans before my senior year, and every now and then I’ve wondered what happened to him in life.

A quick google search of his name and up popped BillLoehfelm.com – SCORE!!!

[BillLoehfelm.com]

Turns out that the dude wrote two novels!!!

His first is called Fresh Kills and it’s in stores now.  His second is called Bloodroot and it will be released on September 3rd.

This is the high school English teacher equivalent of a high school chemistry teacher going out and curing skin cancer only to then curing AIDS a year later!!!

Congrats and WTG Mr. Loehfelm!  (Yes, I ordered Fresh Kills and can’t wait to read it.)

Tree Falling Down (Redux)

Remember that tree that was falling a part I told you guys about about two weeks back?

This one…

It didn’t take long for that limb to fall off.  Less than 14 days after I reported it to the NYC Parks Dept via 311 it looked like this…

Take a closer look…

As you can see the NYC Parks Department did nothing as of Memorial Day afternoon – and so says the 311 ticket – the ticket says PAST DUE.

Less than ten hours after these photos were taken I walked by in the middle of the night and found large bunches of cut up tree all over the surrounding sidewalk and parking spots. 

Yes, the tree fell by way of nature. 

Hopefully nobody was underneath the tree when it fell.

Mr. Panos Resesion (Video)

Here’s the latest Mr. Panos video that discusses the recession.

Bay Ridge Bastards’ Spite Wall

I figured that it was about time that the people who built a spite wall up against their neighbor’s home (and on their neighbor’s property) only to then spend years fighting to make the illegal activity legal should get their own moniker. 

I deem the people who live in the house on the left and who are responsible for this hideous mess, the Bay Ridge Bastards!

As one can imagine that when dealing with a bastard, a bastard is going to act like a bastard.

After losing what should have been their final legal opportunity to make the illegal structure legal the Bay Ridge Bastards have come up with a loophole. 

The main problems with the construction is that it goes against zoning code which states that these houses have at least an eight foot clearance on at least one side of them. 

Plus the whole item about the construction attaching itself to the neighboring foundation/property illegally – the house on the right has inches of property that the wall was inappropriately built on.

The Bay Ridge Bastards found what could have been a loophole to keep the illegal wall up by partially demolishing the original house on the lot, aka the home on the left of the photo.

Doing a partial demolition of eight feet on the left sure should be able to skirt around the existing zoning regulations regarding that whole eight feet of clearance, but it would have done nothing to fix the illegal foundation attachment and building on the neighboring property issues – and it would have been a great big f*ck you to the neighbors with whom they have been spiting for years already.

The plan for partial demolition was submitted less than a week after the Bay Ridge Bastards lost in court - go figure! 

Thankfully the Department of Buildings activated some check and balances.  They looked at the plan and realized that the plan wasn’t kosher for what I can only assume to be the following reasons at bare minimum:

  1. The plan failed to address any of the violations that 123 87th Street currently has against it.
  2. The whole “no asbestos” abatement not being required sounds like 100% BS.
  3. The fact that they’re trying to say that the partial demolition of the building is an alteration but not a substantial alteration making it exempt from the ECCCNYS is 100,000% false!

Thank you Department of Buildings for getting it right in a speedy manner.  Please keep your heads up on them as they are some sneaky bastards.

Pen Pals

One of my young nephews is having some some of school project where he writes letters to a pen pal of his choosing. 

He chose me because I’m awesome and he thinks that I’m the best because I tricked him and his brothers into saying, “Uncle Eric is the best!” whenever someone asked who the best was. 

Anyway, the goal is simple.  Kid writes a letter and I write one back. 

Here’s his letter:

Dear Uncle Eric,

I am hatching chicks at school.  Please write back.  We also planted marigolds.  We are learning all about money.

From,
Nephew

And this shall be mine in return.  Let us all just hope that he doesn’t have access to this blog as it will make his receiving said letter a whole lot less joyous.

Dear Nephew,

I just got back home from my trip to San Francisco.  It was fun out there with perfect weather.  I’m growing sunflowers, poppies and daisies this summer.  Glad to hear about your chicks and marigolds.  Write back.

Best Wishes,
Uncle Eric

I can only imagine that his teacher will assume that Uncle Eric and a complete moron.


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