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The Bridge Of Decaying Confidence

Ladies and Gents, allow us to introduce you to the underbelly of the Manhattan Bridge, the Brooklyn trestle.

And based off of the several thousand times that we’ve crossed the bridge, we think that it should be renamed, The Bridge of Decaying Confidence, in large part to the way that the bridge jumps when an overweight truck speeds across it.

The Best & Worst Advertisement Of All Time

We came across what, in our humble opinion, is the worst advertisement of all time.  It’s a billboard that we snapped a quick pic of as we got on the subway here in NYC, because we needed to see it again to see what we were missing with our bare eyes, and as it turned out, we still didn’t have a clue to what the billboard was advertising.  Our wife saw the pic, and without even hearing us say that we thought that it was the worst billboard of all time said, “Oooh!  That’s the best billboard of all time!”

So, here it is, the best and worst billboard of all time:

If you think that it’s the best billboard of all time, then you know what the billboard is all about, but, for those who are like us and had no idea what the blank slate and March 25 stood for, the billboard is an advertisement for the return of Mad Men to AMC.

Apparently the guy in the suit is part of the cartoon beginning that Mad Men has.  Based off of this newly learn fact, we suspect that the theme for this season of Mad Men’s advertising must have been: let’s only try to get our core audience to return after being off the air for over a year and not even try to get any new viewers, because let’s face it, we’re definitely not going to get any new viewers.  To each their own, we guess.

In any event, whether or not you think that this Mad Men advertisement is the best or worst advertisement ever, we can all probably agree that this ad is a graffiti artist/tagger’s wet dream.  We can’t wait to see if someone draws a big penis that was used as a diving board and a toilet that will be used as a pool in all of that open white space.

Snowglobe Snowstorm 2012

The snowstorm that hit the New York City area yesterday didn’t seem to hit our neck of Brooklyn too bad.  If anything, being out in the snowstorm felt much along the lines of being inside of a snowglobe.  Plus, the lack of too many inches made the snow more meaningful in photo form, at least for us, because when the snow gets too deep, everything just looks white, bleh, and unrecognizable.

We’d like to tip our hats in jest at the good job that the M.T.A. did in ensuring that the temporary wooden platform at the 4th Avenue F/G subway lines remained clear of snow and safe for passenger use.  Someone managed to sprinkle rock salt in approximately half a dozen small patches towards the end of the snow, leaving everything else slippery as could be.  Thankfully the metal temporary staircases at the station were built with handrails.

We Saw Something And Said Something

We’ve been seeing the “if you see something, say something” campaign on the NYC subway for years and years now.  Up until Monday, we never once said something because we never really saw something that needed to be spoken of.


It happened as we stepped off of an uptown R train at Rector Street in the early afternoon.  As we exited the first car, we noticed a woman on the platform walking towards us with a yellow plastic bag that appeared to have a bunch of glass jars in it.  As everyone else on the platform stepped onto the train, this lady went out of her way to place the bag of jars on the platform before she then ran onto the train.

Now this might seem like a simple case of a strange person deciding to leave garbage on a subway platform, but it was also offbeat in that she went out of her way to do so.  Why would she have brought a bag of glass bottles down to the subway and through the turnstile if it was garbage?  Wouldn’t one logically have left them just about anywhere else?  Like a garbage can at home?  A garbage can in the street?  Or simply on a curb?  And why would she risk almost missing the train to place the bag neatly on the platform with only a few seconds time before the train doors close?

So there it was, a yellow plastic bag with what looked to be glass in it on the subway platform.  If the bag was an IED, the glass would act to create shrapnel once the device explodes.

As we exited the turnstile, we went up to the token booth clerk and informed him of how there was a suspicious package on the platform due to a lady having gone out of her way to leave the bag full of glass on the platform before running onto the train.  He asked what the bag looked like, and then looked at us as if we were a crazy person who had escaped from Bellevue for having brought this to his attention.

Based off of our gut feeling about the conversation with that token booth clerk, he didn’t do a thing with, or about that suspicious yellow bag.  He likely went about his day as if we were merely another person who purchased a MetroCard.  And since we haven’t heard anything in the news about an IED being found or exploding at Rector Street, the bag was merely the garbage of a weird lady who brought a full bag of glass to the subway platform to dispose of it by way of the floor of a platform.

So the point of the matter is, the “if you see something, say something” campaign should have a tagline to it that says, “so that the person who you are informing can do absolutely nothing with the potentially lifesaving information that you are providing them.”

Robbie The Robot Is The MTA’s Secret Weapon

Last week, while we waited on the temporary middle platform at 4th Avenue and 9th Street for a Coney Island bound F train, we watched the destruction of the southbound local’s old track bed.  We were impressed by the destruction, because it was taking only two men to jack-hammer several hundred feet of track bed — and they were doing it with ease.  Here was their M.O. — one stood on the platform and watched, while the other did the jack-hammering by way of a robot!


We decided to name the robot “Robbie the Robot” and it has four legs, one jack-hammer, walked like a centipede, and was operated by top of the line mid-1980s VCR remote control technology — a remote control that had a long hardwire connected to the machine.  WAY COOL!

Now, let’s just hope that Robbie the Robot doesn’t turn on us and break free.  We don’t need any Planet of the Robots type of future.


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