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Public Bathroom Mysteries

Walking into a public bathroom at a park in New York City is always a new and different experience.  In fact, it’s probably best to always walk into one with the assumption that something weird or dangerous is going on inside so that you don’t end up falling victim to something.

That said, we were totally thrown off guard when we walked into the men’s room at the Bay 8th Street park in Bath Beach.

Yes, yes it is a SPOTLESS stainless steel set up that appears to be scrubbed down on a daily basis with Brillo. 

It has no privacy once inside due to no doors or walls around the toilet which makes the fact that the outside door remains propped open all the more chilly and raises the question:  Is it indecent exposure to be bottomless while on the toilet when the only door around is wedged wide open?

Also, this mystery soap had us scratching our head.

What happened to the soap dispenser that is clearly on top of the sink?  Why isn’t that good enough to be used?  Did they lose they key?  Also, who in their right mind would use a pink liquid that is inside of an old Poland Spring water bottle that is labeled ‘soap’ in a public bathroom that is in the middle of a park?

The Cost Of Poo

The cost of not picking up after your dog on the streets of New York City near a legible sign and are caught by the imaginary Sanitation Department dog poop patrol: $100 

The cost of not picking up after your dog if caught near this semi legitimate looking sign by the imaginary Sanitation Department dog poop patrol: $450 and your balls will be cut off.

The cost of not picking up after your dog if caught near this faded looking sign by the imaginary Sanitation Department dog poop patrol: $100

The cost of not picking up after your dog if caught near this quasi legitimate looking sign by the not so imaginary Parks Department dog poop patrol: $1,000

The cost of not picking up after your dog if caught near this very much not legitimate whatsoever looking sign by the imaginary Polite Police’s poop patrol: A stern reprimanding.

The cost of not picking up after yourself if you’re caught near this legitimate looking sign by the imaginary Sanitation Department human poop patrol: $20,000

The cost of not picking up after yourself if you wipe yourself with a black leather glove: Priceless 

Seriously, don’t click on that link if you just ate, are eating, are about to eat, blind easily or are weak of heart.


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